Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
