I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
