I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!