Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize