This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize