Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(352): View more from Florida

the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.

(407): View more from Florida

given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was

(352): View more from Florida

i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it

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(317): View more from Indiana

dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.

(1-317): View more from Indiana

details please.

(317): View more from Indiana

they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."

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(301): View more from Maryland

They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."

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(425): View more from Washington

Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.

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(206): View more from Washington

Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"

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