how can u be prego again
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize
