Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
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