I just made out with a guy for $7.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
you told grandpa to call you daddy
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can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
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