..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
