Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
