so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I am naked and annoyed.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize
