1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
