My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
party gras won. party gras always wins.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I just want nice things and good sex
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
