yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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