Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
