Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
The adults are the big ones right?
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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