I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Is Oprah even human
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
