is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize