"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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