Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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