I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Randomize