Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
