This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Randomize
