Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
