yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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