Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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