Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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