Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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