we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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