Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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