i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Randomize
