Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize
