I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
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