her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
