Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
