their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
operation have a gay friend backfired
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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