What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
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