in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Randomize
