I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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