Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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