I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
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