Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
