Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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