Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Randomize
