I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
