Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
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