i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize