I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize