I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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